Author Topic: Storys from a virtual pub in shetland.  (Read 1346 times)

George

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Re: Stories.. taking advantage o geordie.
« Reply #15 on: January 23, 2011, 07:06:59 am »
George,
I hope you are going to leave a bottle of red wine paid for behind the bar (aka 'in the wood').
I'll remind Alky and her twin aboot ye while yer stoatin aboot Paisley.
And have the polis been advised of your imminent arrival?
   
hello mg..I could only get an old bottle o VP I found it in da attic, I brought it up here 30 years ago, there is only a wee drap oot o it.. but it might be ok ta drink, try it oot on fifi first, I think she likes a wee drink, if she dusna throw up after 15 minutes then it should be ok ta drink............ tell da twins to get thereself ower to the plastic surgeon and get aw they defects sorted oot before I came back, I'm fair scunnered looking at dem....
see you later I m off to load up the car.....

Oh dear, the pub is so quiet today. What's missing??? Ah, no George that's what's missing. He did say he'd leave money in the green pig for us all to have a couple of drinks on him. Hmm - 50p that won't get us very far. Ah well, put it on his slate Alky there's nothing on it at the moment and I could do with a wee cider. OK, that's 2.00 he owes you so far. He'll be only too willing to pay when he comes back.  A more generous man you could never wish to meet.......now who's next for a drink on George?

Oh dear, the pub is so quiet today.  What's missing??? Ah, no George that's what's missing. He did say he'd leave money in the green pig for us all to have a couple of drinks on him. Hmm - 50p that won't get us very far. Ah well, put it on his slate Alky there's nothing on it at the moment and I could do with a wee cider. OK, that's 2.00 he owes you so far. He'll be only too willing to pay when he comes back.  A more generous man you could never wish to meet.......now who's next for a drink on George?

Another bottle of your best red wine please Alky. 1928 Chateau Ecosse? That'll do nicely. Cheers I'll have it as a carry-oot! 40 you say, yes put it on George's slate will you!

That's 47.00 so far.

Oops I've just spotted that George is on line. I thought he'd gone to Paisley toon building sheds and things!!!!

I'm going to hide behind the bar before he spots me!

I'll have another cider and put it on your slate thanks and I'll have scampi and chips followed by hot chocolate fudge cake with ice cream please Alky. I've no kitchen until Friday, you see. Yes, no problem put it on George's slate again - he's not noticed yet. No, he's too busy having dreams about building sheds or something.............................

The bill? 20 no probs. That's 67 George owes you. He'll be back next month to settle up with you.

Any one else for a free dram??

George......I think you'll need to do a few peerie jobs for cash while you're away, otherwise these gluttonous alkies will have you bankrupt by the time you return..

Morning all,
I thought I'd come in da Rest for a full Scottish breakfast wi all da trimmings:
Ayrshire bacon
Steak Slice
White & black pudding
Cloete dumpling
Sliced haggis
Eggs
Griddle cakes
Tomato
Mushrooms
Fried potato

c/w Morning rolls and coffee.

Please put it on Georges slate, he left firm instructions that I had to keep my strength up for the Alky twins.

Yes, I'm sure that he can forget his cholesterol until tomorrow!

Now that's a full Scottish breakfast at - how much Alky?

10 - that's OK!

77 on George's slate!

It'll be more than a few jobs he'll need to do to settle this bill!!!

Just dropped in for a quick stiffener. I'm of oot for an Indian curry tonight. I will not return later as my garlicky breath will probably kill vampires at twenty paces.
As an afterthought make that malt a large one as it's going on Geo's tab.

Hope you choke on it. efter running up my bar tab, its a disgrace taking advantage o an auld codger like me... ???... thats nearly a weeks pension up in smoke.. you should all hing your heeds in shame..... .......................... Hi. Alky, wid you like ta hae a wee holiday in Paisley toon wae me..... it will only cost you 77 the same as my bar tab.....

Hope  you all enjoyed da banter till da next time..

george [aka] geordie..